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Time to Stop Feeling Guilty

Updated: Aug 19, 2021

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Ladies, have you ever wondered what gives you immense joy? Ever felt like being irresponsible for one day and having the freedom to do whatever your heart desires? I'm sure we all have at various points in our everyday life. But the real question is, do we go ahead in pursuing that desire?

As evident, it may seem, many of us struggle with the notion of putting ourselves first. We have been raised to believe that we should always put others before us and ignore our own needs, because somehow that it is arrogant or self-centered in some way, and not a nice thing to do. According to one survey in the UK, 95% of women have felt guilty at least once in the past 24 hours. It's not at all shocking when I think of all the different things, we seem to feel guilty about as women. The constant urge to appease all suggests that women live in constant fear about how they might end up offending others around them with their words or actions. Therefore, many continue to live in fear and guilt, which leads to them being dissatisfied with their life as the years pass by. And it's about time to stop feeling guilty!

Here are some of the things women should never feel guilty about.

Being assertive: In the workplace or even at home, women often are made to feel as though they cannot be assertive, at the risk of being called rude or difficult. Everyone has the right to get their opinion heard, and that means you speak your mind without apologising for your thoughts.

Making Your Choices: Our society seem to have a weirdly strict timeline when it comes to marriage, children, and owning a house. Don’t forget it is your life and you deserve to live it according the schedule that works for you. It does not matter what age you do or not do any of these things.

Saying ‘NO’: If you’re being guilt tripped into saying yes for something you do not wish to be a part of, remember that you do not owe anyone anything and saying ‘NO’ is not selfish. It is another form of self-care and you should practice this more often.

Removing people from your life: It's confusing and difficult to be able to determine whether someone's involvement is more exhausting than useful, so listen when a part of you comes to the conclusion and do not hesitate to distance yourself from toxic people.

Expressing your emotions: Since forever, we women have been trying to debunk the ugly stereotype that women are just too emotional and I would say yes, we are, but just the right amount to get ourselves together and remain in tune with our wants and needs. Never feel ashamed for your emotions and expressing them. I don’t think there is anything better than a good scream or rant after a bad week.

Asking for Help: Seeking assistance does not mean that you have failed, nor does it mean that you are not strong enough. We cannot be always the Miss. Perfectionist and be expected to work, cook, clean and nurture relationships at the same time without feeling exhausted. Henceforth, asking for help without being judged or guilty is something we all deserve.

Make-Up/Sense of Style: If you like wearing make-up than it is perfect and if you do not prefer wearing make-up that is also perfect! No one has the right to decide for you, so if you want to rock that winged liner for a casual breakfast affair in a formal outfit, you go ahead gurl!

Entertainment that you enjoy: Watching something on TV or any OTT platform is an amazing way to forget about your own struggles and just watch the drama made up. If your go-to is a romantic comedy or reality television, there is nothing shameful about enjoying the content that gives you joy, as long as you can think critically about the content you’re consuming.

Taking out time for Self-Care: Always remember to give back to bodies that we put through so much of stress and work daily. It won’t take long for it to shut down like an empty fuel tank if you’re not going to take good care of it. So, invest a couple of hours for going to the gym or exercising at home. Do not miss your meals and don’t feel guilty for taking time off to de-stress. Your body deserves the love and care to be fully functioning and coping with the pressures of daily lives.

Making Mistakes: Although everybody speaks about ‘humans make mistakes’; it may seem as though it is assumed that women are beyond this traditional cliché. But no, we are just as human as everyone else and we make mistakes too! And we learn from those mistakes and grow into better versions of ourselves. You do not need to be carrying the responsibility for always being the ‘Miss. Right’. This list is going to end here but this doesn’t mean there isn’t any more to add. There is so much more that we women need to stop feeling guilty about and start placing ourselves at the top of our priority list with pride.

We all need to understand that it is impossible to please everyone around you and always look for our happiness in that of others all the time. It is okay to be selfish on someways. To live how you want and not what others expect of you. “It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, & to make your happiness a priority. It’s necessary.” by Mandy Hale

With Gratitude & Love

From Our Founder Caroline Mc Guinness

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